Hostessing Do's and Don'ts: From Beverage Dispensers to Dress Codes

There are certain rules that every hostess should follow. Many are just good ol' common sense, while others are things that might not even occur to you. Here are some of the big ones:

Don't:

- Bury yourself in the kitchen while you have people over. Plans sometimes get thrown off-kilter, but try your hardest to keep to a schedule so that you'll be able to give your guests as much face time as possible.

- Badger people about whether or not the food's okay. Chances are no one's going to tell you if your brisket is too dry or the brownies are underbaked, anyway, and preempting the issue will make it seem like you're fishing for compliments.

- Flit around from guest to guest like a hummingbird, asking again and again if they need a drink refill. Invest in a few beverage dispensers and point them out to people beforehand.

- Talk about dishes you were considering serving. There's nothing wrong with making things easier on yourself and going with something simple, like a tasty pasta dish or casserole, but your guests might not be able to think, "Yes, it is a shame she didn't serve that filet mignon."

- Brag. You might be a world-class chef, but your guests will notice and compliment you on their own. (If they don't, it's most likely because they know you know what a great cook you are, in which case you should probably work on your humility.) This goes for decorations as well. If someone brings up the lovely new tabletop accessories you recently bought, or the striking oil painting you did yourself, feel free to make modest conversation of it.

- Let a bad mood ruin the party. If you've been having a terrible day, try to set aside your anger and have fun. If you absolutely know you won't be able to get out of your funk and need to cancel the engagement, let people know as soon as possible.

Do:

- Have a variety of foods. Depending on the size of your gathering, it's wise to see who of your guests has diet restrictions (whether because of allergies or choice), so Sally can eat something other than the salad, and Harry doesn't go into anaphylactic shock when he tries the brownies. This goes for beverages as well. Keep in mind that not everyone might drink alcohol, so have several non-alcoholic options.

- Keep pets locked up. You never know who might be allergic or just deathly terrified of Spot or Fluffy. Plus if puppy get s too excited he might end up knocking over those beverage dispensers! Don't ignore your pet the entire night -- slip away to make sure he has food and water and give him a good scratch.

- Forewarn guests about any special conditions you might have. Not wanting children at a party is perfectly find, but let people know beforehand so they can arrange for a babysitter. Also let them know if there's a dress code. You might not really care if Alice shows up in jeans and a T-shirt, but she probably won't feel comfortable if everyone else is in their finest evening wear.


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